Week 8-No Matter How Long or Hard the Road

This class never ceases to amaze me in that I continue to learn something fantastic every week that I am in this class. I have loved it and I am sad that it is already half way over. This week I have been reflecting on my life for the last few years as I have some life changes coming my way very soon. 

I am getting engaged here very shortly and will be getting married this Fall. Along with this I am starting a brand new job in the next few weeks, buying a duplex and purchasing a dog. All of this will happen in the next 6 months. My path to get to this amazing place I am currently in has not been an easy one though. I have never shared this before in a public place so I ask that you be sensitive with what I am writing. I am writing this for more my own record then anything.

Some people say bad things come in 3's and I am living proof of the talk by Elder Holland on hanging in there even when the times get tough because God will always reward us.

FIRST:

This August marks 4 years since my brother and I were in a fatal ATV accident that almost took our lives. Just above Cedar City my brother was driving us up on a red rock gravel road to the water reservoir with my parents just a little ways in front of us. In his competitive nature he was speeding up the roads as fast as he could in order to catch up to our parents. As a result of this instead of going left on a turn we went right and our ATV became sandwiched in a large fence and we were thrown from the ATV. My parents were able to find us shortly after the crash and we were blessed to be able to get one phone call out to our family that we were staying with as their was little cell reception there. Following this a man came in truck that happened to have Onstar that was able to contact emergency services and 2 life flights came to our rescue. 

I was life flighted to a level one trauma centre in Las Vegas, Nevada after I had passed out and they found that I had suffered a subdural hematoma (a severe quick bleed on the surface of the brain), broken most of the bones in the left side of my face and a severe concussion. After a blessing from my Dad when they arrived in Las Vegas and what was a sheer miracle my brain bleed subsided on its own (which is extremely rare) and I was released from the hospital a little more then a week later.

A week after that I had reconstructive surgery done in the left side of my face and I now have 4 plates and 12 screws that were placed in my face. I had a small amount of short term memory loss but was able to have a full recovery within about 6 months to a year.

My brother on the other hand suffered a compound fracture of his femur (his bone had broken and punctured through his skin) and was taken to St. George to have a titanium rod placed down his leg. As a result of improper care given to him at that hospital he proceeded to get a severe infection. From this he almost went septic (where the infection is so severe it begins to shut down your organs) and we almost lost him multiple times over the course of 2-3 months. As a result of this infection he had 9 surgeries, 3 different titanium rods  
placed down his leg, 3 PICC lines placed and removed and was in out of the hospital for over 3 months.

There came many points where we did not know if my brother would make it but yet again through a lot of spiritual inspiration, blessings and pure miracle from God he made it through. The road to our recovery was not an easy one at all but throughout the process each person in my family received inspiration to know that he would be okay. He is now surviving a mission in Ghana Africa and will be home this coming Fall and I could not be more stoked.

My brother on the left with one of his converts being a goof as usual :)

SECOND:

Shortly after our accident I started dating a guy that less then a year later would become my husband. I knew without a shadow of a doubt through inspiration that he was the person I was meant to marry and be with forever. We were married in June 2012 in the Seattle Temple and I could not have been happier.

Right after we got married he flipped a switched and the man I had dated and known for over a year was not the man I was married to. The day after we got married and moving forward he became both emotionally and verbally abusive on a regular basis. I was expected to not only work full time to provide for our bills but to also go to school part time, take care of all of the household duties, cook all the meals, and do anything else he asked me to do, all while he only went to school with 12 credits. 

If I did not do exactly what he believed I should I was told how worthless I was. That I would never be a good mother, that I was a terrible wife, I would never finish my degree or amount to anything in life. Along with this he punched holes in walls and threw things when he was angry. 

After seven months of marriage he came to me after returning home from the temple and said that God has given him the revelation that we were meant to get divorced and we were no longer supposed to be together. Shortly after he left me and filed for an annulment of our marriage, along with our temple marriage in 2013. 

To say the least it was the most awful situation of my life. I had done exactly what I was prompted to do and we both had received clear inspiration that we were meant together and yet my ex chose a different path for both of our lives. Although our marriage was hard I made a promise to God to do everything I could to make it work and that is exactly what I did. Upon my ex deciding to end out marriage I was blessed with immense amount of peace by our Father in Heaven that I had done everything God had asked me to do and I was able to move on knowing I had done all God has asked of me.

THIRD:

After everything that my family and I have been through we are close to say the least. About 3 months ago I had a very scary dream where in that dream one of my parents became very sick which I though was just a dream and shook it off until I was at home for Christmas two months ago. Shortly after being home my parents told me the news that my Mom has stage 2 breast cancer. 

This completely rocked my world to say the least and my initial reaction was to be angry with God for having put me and my family already through so much. Then my Dad said something that resonated with me  in that "God blesses us with these trials to make us stronger and to help us grow individually and as a family" and that completely changed my perspective.

She just started chemo 2 weeks ago and with her treatment plans she has an over 70% chance at a 10+ year survival rate. Similar to the situation with my brother through a lot of prayers, priesthood blessings and other things we all know that my mom has a very long life ahead of her. 

My Mom and I shortly after I received the news of her Cancer

THE WHY:

If you read this far I am more then impressed and you may be wondering why this is important. To me this is important because these experiences have allowed me to become the person I am today, which is a better person then I could have ever imagined being at this point in my life. This quote fits perfectly as to the last 3 years of my life. 

"As you wage such personal wars, obviously part of the strength to “hang in there” comes from some glimpse, however faint and fleeting, of what the victory can be. It is as true as when Solomon said it that “where there is no vision, the people perish” (Prov. 29:18). If your eyes are always on your shoelaces, if all you can see is this class or that test, this date or that friend, this disappointment or that dilemma, then it really is quite easy to throw in the towel and stop the fight. But what if it is the fight of your life? Or more precisely what if it is the fight for your life, and your eternal life at that? What if beyond this class or that test, this date or that friend, this disappointment or that dilemma you really can see and hope for all the best and right things that God has to offer. Oh, it may be blurred a bit by the perspiration that keeps running riverlike into your eyes, and in a really difficult fight one of the eyes might even be closing a bit; but faintly, dimly, and ever so far away you can see the object of it all. And you say it is worth it, you do want it, you will fight on."

No matter what the situation in my life whether it is personal or in business I will never give up because I know and have seen that faint, dim object of it all. I will never quit, never surrender and always continue to push on with the help of those that love me and my Father in Heaven. I am beyond happy with where my life is right now and I look forward to what is next.

My boyfriend (soon to be fiance) Kyle and I at his work Christmas party 

Week 7-Integrity and Honesty

This week as I was reading the article from the Harvard Business Review and answering the questions in our reflection for this week I was really able to contemplate more on the concept of honesty and integrity.

I have always considered myself someone that was honest and full of integrity. It has not been until recently though that I have realized how important it is to me in the people I choose to both work and associate with. Working at the previous company that I worked for after I was let go I found out some shady things had occurred at the company with our previous CEO. These things were sad to me and did not sit well that I was a part of a company that allowed for those things to happen. In the end though it made me appreciate people like my boss who are upfront and honest with you and tell you how things are and not just want you want to hear. He helped to show me what true honesty and integrity look like when done correctly. Not just for their benefit but for everyone's benefit long term.

Moving forward I always want to do anything and everything I can to be upfront and honest in everything that I do in life. Not just on a personal level but on a business level as well. I know that as I do this as I set my standards high that God will reward me in the long run and I will be much happier as well.

Week 6-The Dip Continues

This week was really good for me in that I was able to finish the book called The Dip and it could not have come at a more perfect time. As a result of some turmoil at my job they have decided that they were going to shut their doors. As a result of this change in business decisions they let go of multiple people this last week, including myself early this week. This did not come as a huge shock to me though as the company had been evicted from its office as we had not been able to pay our bills there. Thanks to being able to finish The Dip this last week it really helped to give me perspective on my situation for a few different reasons.

First, I found that the book helped to teach me that sometimes it is a good thing in order to move on for an opportunity or business to just quit. This it seems is exactly what happened with my opportunities and me with the company. It was very hard for me to have the feeling of letting something go that I have worked on for the better part of the last two years. In some ways it was good thing because it allowed me to finally move on in my career.

Second, it helped me to realize the times when it is okay to quit and move on. In the companies circumstance I believe that they should have quit a while ago instead of continuing to get the business more and more in the hole. As a result there is a large amount of monies that are still owed. In all reality they probably should have quit sooner when they saw the signs that they were going to fail.

In reality, although I am sad I am grateful that I am able to finally move on to something else in my career. It will be something with more opportunity and definitely more pay as well.

Week 6-The Dip Continues

This week was really good for me in that I was able to finish the book called The Dip and it could not have come at a more perfect time. As a result of some turmoil at my job they have decided that they were going to shut their doors. As a result of this change in business decisions they let go of multiple people this last week, including myself early this week. This did not come as a huge shock to me though as the company had been evicted from its office as we had not been able to pay our bills there. Thanks to being able to finish The Dip this last week it really helped to give me perspective on my situation for a few different reasons.

First, I found that the book helped to teach me that sometimes it is a good thing in order to move on for an opportunity or business to just quit. This it seems is exactly what happened with my opportunities and me with the company. It was very hard for me to have the feeling of letting something go that I have worked on for the better part of the last two years. In some ways it was good thing because it allowed me to finally move on in my career.

Second, it helped me to realize the times when it is okay to quit and move on. In the companies circumstance I believe that they should have quit a while ago instead of continuing to get the business more and more in the hole. As a result there is a large amount of monies that are still owed. In all reality they probably should have quit sooner when they saw the signs that they were going to fail.

In reality, although I am sad I am grateful that I am able to finally move on to something else in my career. It will be something with more opportunity and definitely more pay as well.

Week 5-The Dip

So this week has been extremely interesting to me in that I did not have the next book for our book reports that was due so I started reading The Dip as I had received it the week before in the mail. The ironic thing was that recently I have been going through a dip of my own in my current job.

As I have alluded to before about the current struggles with my job in that I am not sure how much longer I will have a job or the stability of the job that I do have. I love what I do but there has not been a lot of stability in the last few months with a lot of uncertainty. I have wondered for the last while if staying at the company through this "dip" was still going to be the best choice for me in the long run and it was worth my time and energy.

I have been underpaid and overworked for quite some time and before the last while it has been for a vision and plan that I wholeheartedly believed in. Then recently the vision and plan moving forward has changed drastically. As a result my perspective on this "dip" has changed significantly in that I believe that it may be time to quit and move on to something else.

Quitting is not something that I take lightly and to be honest never planned on quitting from this job or company that I am currently at. Even if I do choose to leave and start new ventures in my life it will be because the "dip" was something that I had to quit and not just because it was the easy route out. It is vital for me to remember both now and in the future how vital it is to stick it out through the hard things and not just quit when the going gets tough.